Somewhere Over the Rainbow

I have often lived my life thinking, when we get ahead on the bills. Or when things calm down. Or even when I have time. So I put a lot of things off. I planned them only to see them collapse when life happened. It has meant a lot of missed opportunities for life experiences. It has meant a lot of times when I wanted to do things and didn’t. It’s not exactly regret. I try not to live regretting things. But it does mean I have missed a lot of chances to do things I really wanted to do.

Some of it is responsibility. I had my first child when I was 20. As a single parent I had to work, had to support us, and didn’t have the freedom to take big risks or blow some things off. And now, I have 3 kids, two of them grown and one still at home. So I still have other lives depending on me, so it’s not quite possible to throw chance to the wind and do as I want. No living in a camper traveling the world…yet.

But I have also learned that if I keep putting things off and waiting for the right time, the right chance, the right whatever – I’ll end up dying with all of these should haves and could haves. The will have dangled just on the horizon of my vision with me sighing and wishing I could go there, do that, have that. So maybe the time is now, maybe I should do it now, go there now, get it now.

What I want to see and do has also changed. I have found that over time, I have wanted less “things” and wanted more experiences. I have come to treasure time more than items. I want more experiences to do more things than I want to own more stuff. But time is the one thing I can’t replace. I can’t go to the store and buy a few more years. I can’t set back my watch and get back some time I wasted. So maybe it’s time to slide down off the rainbow and start doing some of these things rather than waiting for the right time to do them. Because once my time is gone, there is no getting it back.